There Is No Article, No Book That Can Explain The Complexities Of Our Lives

In a 2012 TV mini-series titled Political Animals, Susan Berg devoted her entire career to covering, analyzing, and criticizing Elaine Barrish’s marriage; she even won an award on her piece about Elaine’s husband!

As a former first lady and now secretary of state, Elaine Barrish was expected to have a certain kind of marriage and when it didn’t look like it on the outside; she was criticized by journalists such as Susan Berg.

When she eventually got really close to Elaine and her family, Susan Berg discovered how ignorant she has been, spending years writing about and criticizing something she didn’t have full knowledge of.

When she finally got the opportunity to interview Elaine Barrish face to face, she asked her many questions about her marriage and one of Elaine’s answers was; “there is no article, no book that can explain the complexities of a single marriage”

It is one of the most accurate things I have heard about marriage.

It also applies to life – my life, your life, and all lives.

Our lives are complex, and no matter how much we think we know about what is happening in other people’s lives, the truth is we may be 100% wrong.

You can even live with someone and still be totally wrong about what you think you know about them.

It is human to talk about other people, but it is inhumane to spread gossip, judge, define and make decisions about people based on the negative assumptions we have or the lies we choose to hold on to about their lives. Especially when these people are just trying to live their lives and have not done anything to harm us or anyone.

Think about it, why throw so much sensationalism, judgment, and ridicule at someone who is just trying to figure out life, and has never hurt you or anyone in the process?



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Featured photo by Prince Akachi on Unsplash

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Shola Okubote

My name is Shola Okubote, I am the Founder of You can reach me on Twitter – @sholaokubote, and Instagram – sholaokubote

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